Saturday, July 09, 2011

Getting Plumper By The Year... by Maureen Eich VanWalleghan

It's Saturday morning and I keep changing my mind about what to post, but as I sit here at my desk with the hiccups, the issue of fat, my fat, being fat keeps swirling in my mind. Fat is a very “politically uncorrect” way to call this state of being, but I don’t feel like sugar-coating things, so If you are easily offended stop here.

Late life spread has occurred for me. It is such a drag. I look in the mirror and see the fat mushrooming over the sides of my pants and I am repulsed. I hate this fat more than my wrinkles. Somehow the wrinkles feel more “natural” in the aging process. But fat just feels like I am not taking care of myself. And to be sure, I am not.

Let me just say this so I can see it for myself. Pizza is not my friend. Pizza is not my friend. I should probably say it a third time since pizza is sitting on my kitchen counter right now calling me like the sirens from the Odyssey. Calling me to my peril. Pizza is the food of the gods and mothers. Last night was pizza night and a movie. Easy cooking for me to be sure. We accommodated the husband with the special pepperoni that he can eat, but I willingly sacrificed myself at the alter of wheat and had the darn pizza even though it was not the gluten-free crust that we can make at home. I have a great need for ease when it comes to eating...and cooking.

I just don’t cook for my family the way I would cook for myself. I don’t usually want to eat what my family wants to eat. And I would not have in my house—not because I don’t like it, but because I have no will power—the food that fills my fridge and cabinets. And now I have the fat to prove it.

My husband is a meat and potatoes man. I am fish eater. When I lived alone I cooked once a week and made enough food to live out of the fridge for the week. I ate fish, salmon every day along with a whole grain, lots of veggies and a ridiculous amount of green apples. Now I eat very different. Not really bad, but...there is so much tempting fare around that I am unhappy with my choices.

Okay so I don’t want to b#$%h, but I am amazed that my husband has will power and will not sacrifice his comfort when something is bad for him. He just won’t eat it and he is accommodated. That is really the crux of the matter. It’s not so much a man thing either. I have women friends who are not fat, I have yet to say they have this ability as well. So the quality to accommodate others at my expense or not, is a solidly good quality and has served me well in work and in many social situations. It does not serve me when it comes to caring for myself.

Now here’s the kicker...I have a daughter, who I want to be a good example for and so this issue of fat and really taking care of myself in terms of exercise and eating what is best for me is an imperative. But just how does one get there: not sure. Really it’s an attitude change I have to make. My husband will shop and buy whatever I want and he is sensitive to the issue that I don’t eat what I should. So really I need to invest the time. Carve out the time with a pick axe for the daily exercise and cooking food that I love. There it is in black and white...maybe a little accountability would help. Anyone want to start a blog on this??

Well, my goal for this week is to make enough fish lunches for the week for myself and have salad for dinner. No so much as a diet, but it’s the food I really like and crave and my body loves. Some of the ingredients for my fish lunches have been out on the counter since last week. Now to invest in myself. To really put my health and comfort first.

Think good thoughts for me and wish me luck...

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Blogger Monica said...

Hey Mo, I can relate! I could use the blog for accountability program. I need to excercise more and eat less chocolate - a very difficult thing for me since chocolate is my work day stress relief and as you know, my work day is really stressful lately. Let me know when you want to start. Monica.

10:20 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Hey Mo, love to you at any size! I have battled the bulge most of my life and HATE it! I don't battle the same way others do but living as a "problem eater" for about 17 years of my life as I have gotten old I found many things that I love, no longer love me.

Being healthy does not mean we have to look like those size 2 models in many of those magazines. I have found that I have to feel good, and one way to do it is not to stress myself out on what I am eating as much as why I am eating it.

Pizza is the down fall of many of us women and it is hard to lay it down, but when I think of how my stomach will feel after eating just one little slice I do the double thought and back down it goes. So I too eat very little highly processed wheat products such as pizza dough, cake flour, danish and so on because I personally found my stomach rumbles like a 1956 Ford pickup, and within the hour I am stationed on the porcelain throne.

This is not always the easy to do but knowing that my body doesn't like it makes it easier for me to put things down. But in turn my brain tells me I want pizza so what I do is de-construct pizza. Now if I was making a pizza for myself I would put several fresh low fat goat and feta cheeses on it, fresh tomatoes, and spinach. Now plate that up without the pizza dough and theres dinner!

I found that de-constructing a lot of meals has helped me just to be healthy. I eat what it is that I really want and have kicked out those hard to lay off of no-no's

Try this with the Pizza night

(there is no way to de-construct mash potatoes and gravy) LOL

Cathy Cawelti Wells

11:34 AM  

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