Thursday, December 10, 2009

Domesticity -- by Robin

Nothing has gone smoothly this week.

We've been going shopping for the basement. Bought a bed at IKEA, along with a wardrobe. (My first time shopping there.) Purchased a television (not from there). And, reached out to a charity to donate furniture, clothing and other items.

What is it about service these days?

The wardrobe was sent for assembly with the wrong size doors. The television did not have a cable connection (my husband thought it would). And, the charity was so particular that they actually refused some of the items we were hoping to give away.

After spending hours at home awaiting all the deliveries, etc....I then wound up spending considerable time on the phone trying to straighten things out. And, have to yet again wait for things to be redelivered, etc. It's enough to frustrate anyone.

And, being the one who works from home, the bulk of it falls on my plate. I know it's not unique to us, but I do find it challenging at times being a stay-at-home mom who has to oversee everything from house stuff, to shopping, to arranging playdates, social outings, etc, all while working from my kitchen table. Don't get me wrong....I'm very grateful to be able to work from home, but it's a lot of juggling and easy distraction.

In that sense, I'm envious of my husband who goes to his office, or the office of a client, and focuses on the tasks at hand. He has a specific agenda, and while things don't always go smoothly, he's wearing his suit 'n tie, and there is no questioning that he's at work. Whereas, for me, as a work at home mom, my uniform of choice is often stretch pants and a tshirt, while I put on my professional cap. No one sees me, except for the delivery guys, if I don't venture out of the house. I don't miss the pantyhose and heels, so that's a positive.

My acting class ended this week, and I will miss it. I might sign up again in March, depending on my husband's work schedule since it will be tax season at that time. It was nice to have that on my weekly schedule as something that I could count on (other than gym visits).

In class, I wasn't a stay at home mom. I was stretching myself to see who I could become, both that night and looking ahead. Work defines you in so many ways, for better or worse.

I don't miss the commuting into Manhattan...I used to work in the city....but I do miss the energy. Maybe one day I'll return to it, even if part time? Who knows?!

I was speaking with a friend earlier this week who said that she was actually asking herself one day if she should go shopping at Pathmark or King Kullen (a store she doesn't frequent...but to break up the routine)? And, maybe she'd really "let loose" and instead of buying the typical red delicious apples, perhaps she'd be more daring and try the granny smiths? She had me totally cracking up because I fully understood.

I applaud all stay at home moms and others who bear domestic responsibility (men included). We're in it together, and when you're walking down that produce aisle, sharing a good belly laugh sometimes makes all the difference.

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