Week 8 Update: Fit or Fabulous? by Liimu

Week 8 update: I am down a total of 10.5 pounds since I started and definitely can start to see a difference. I’m still on track to reach my goal of being fabulous by Max’s first birthday on March 14, 2012.

Speaking of fabulous, I did a google search today and looked up “how to be fabulous.” How sad is that? With four kids (one of them a not-quite-eight-month old), a thriving consulting business, a budding singing/songwriting career and a very public quest to regain my pre-pregnancy figure, I am feeling quite a loss for where I would find the extra time to get that put-together look I see in women all around me and on TV. How does J Lo end up the Most Beautiful Woman in the World, when she’s the same age as me and has toddler TWINS? Ok, right, right, right. I know what you’re all thinking. She’s in the business to look good – it’s her job. AND she has an entire staff helping her. But still. I’m not trying to look all Gucci’d out every minute of the day. But I would like to find a way to get a workout in and a full day’s work and still have time for a shower, make up and a quick hair styling that doesn’t involve a scrunchie.

All that being said, it hasn’t escaped me how ironic it is that Kim Kardashian – known for her drop-dead gorgeous looks and sex appeal – was dying to get married for years and then wasn’t even able to make it through one entire season of the year before she filed for divorce. J Lo is on divorce number 3. Halle Berry is still gorgeous and always looks perfectly put together, whether on the red carpet or at the playground with her equally gorgeous baby and yet she is allegedly getting ready for marriage number three? Four?

I’m not trying to be catty. I completely feel for this women and how frustrating and lonely it must be to not be able to forge and maintain a partnership that’s satisfying and fulfilling. It must be hard to do that when you’re constantly in the public eye, constantly on the go for a demanding career, and feeling the pressure to get as much done as you can while you still have the beauty and youth that seem to be at the top of the list of requirements for women in Hollywood. I made a choice when I was younger to put my dreams of becoming a famous actress and pop star to the side because I was headed down a very dark and destructive path, a tragic fate that would be all but sealed if I pursued a career in entertainment. Instead, I took a safer, corporate track, but could never completely let me dreams go. I became a wedding singer and met my husband. We began having kids immediately, and I kept singing and performing all the while, even getting the chance at one point to perform a solo with Patti Labelle on NBC television in front of 10 million viewers. I still pursue music to this day, as I said, writing and performing original music at local venues all year round and I hope one day to have the success I longed for so long ago. I do it now as much to show my kids how important it is to pursue your dreams as for myself.

I’m not glamorous and fabulous right now. It will probably take me 12 months to get back to a size I’m comfortable with, where it takes most actresses and pop stars less than 12 weeks. I’m overwhelmed most days and with a staff of just me, my husband and our mother’s helper, I’m happy just to get to 9 pm having clothed, bathed, and fed all my kids, helped them with homework, worked a full day, worked out, showered, and eaten healthy myself. If I’m able to also say that I rehearsed for a gig, volunteered for the junior choir, coached a friend, or gotten my nails done, that’s a bonus. If I’ve put on makeup and done my hair, that’s a freakin’ miracle.

Any advice you guys can give for how to look fabulous every day in ten minutes or less, please let me know! And if you know of a cheap personal stylist who can help me get my closet full of clothes that fit, flatter and help me in my quest for fabulousness, even better.

BodyFIT update: I finally downloaded the BodyFIT iPhone app and am now consistently tracking my nutrition data too, so I can clearly see the daily deficit calories burned vs. calories eaten. That is game-changing and definitely the reason I lost another 3 pounds this week.

Hare Today, Here Tomorrow - by Liimu

It is such a beautiful and sunny day and I’m so grateful to have the life that I have today, especially when I think about how far I’ve come. Sometimes, though, I have to be conscious of where I’m going, and how fast I’m trying to get there. Like the tortoise and the hare, I can often be so focused on going, going, going, that I burn myself out and then end up missing the entire point of the journey.

I have a friend who I have known for many, many years. She and I have traveled along together in the journey of becoming our best selves, including losing weight. In fact, I met her online on eDiets, and over the course of time as we became friends, we began to see each other in person and then she moved to live 5 min from me. She saw me gain 90 pounds with my first baby and lose 70 of it in the first 7 months. She saw me quickly get pregnant with my 2nd child, less than 9 months after the birth of my first, and then lose the 45 pounds I gained in less than a year. She has essentially seen me work my ass off, literally. But what she has also seen are three things: She has seen me workout diligently 5-6 days a week since she has known me. She has seen me workout at that pace, regardless of how heavy I am; in 2008, I ran a half marathon tipping the scales at 196 pounds (I am 5’5”). She has also seen that no matter how hard I try, if I am not paying attention to what I eat, I can’t make any forward progress and that often if I work too hard, I burn out and then eat everything in sight, essentially undoing any progress I may have made.

What I have seen in her, if nothing else, is unerring consistency. Initially, she consistently was unable to make any forward progress. Last May, she joined me on a program that I absolutely believe is one of the top fitness programs available today, an online nutrition and fitness program called Dreambodies. Where other programs that touted the benefits of counting points, using meal replacement shakes, or getting in-person counseling and pre-packaged meals had failed us, Dreambodies seemed to have the perfect formula for success. When my friend saw that I had blasted out of the gate yet again and lost 30 pounds, she finally acquiesced and signed up herself. She saw immediate results, and now, a year later is within just a couple pounds of her goal. I still weigh the exact same amount that I did the day she signed up. With her unerring consistency and dogged persistence, she has surpassed my success and gotten even further along the journey, just like the tortoise passed the hare sleeping at the base of the oak tree sabotaged by his overeager start (and overconfident arrogance). I am learning from my friend what it means to be consistent, and the value of patient persistence.

Until yesterday, I was focused on and frustrated by my lack of ability, instead of being motivated and inspired by my friend’s unique constancy and how it has served her. Finally, in these last couple of days, I have noticed my energy and shifted it to a positive mindset and I have realized that if I can learn from her example and exhibit the same consistency, faith, positivity and courage (and keep track of what goes in my mouth), I will break through the barrier of self and have the same wonderful success she is now enjoying.

Yes, this week I’m thinking about the tortoise and the hare and how sometimes the world looks at the hares of the world and celebrates their slick, fast moves – Nicole Richie lose the baby weight in 6 weeks! Kim Kardashian loses 5 lbs in 5 days to get back at her ex! And maybe I’ve been the hare in this whole thing up till now, and it’s done nothing to get me where I’m going. Hare today, here tomorrow, as if I’m the one sleeping at the base of that old oak tree. But I’m awake now and ready to hop alongside that tortoise at a nice, even pace. So, big shout outs to the tortoises of the world. Thanks for reminding us that slow and steady wins the race!