GUEST BLOG POST: Take Time to Smell the Roses by Dr. Susan Bartell

It’s April and spring has finally sprung! The sun is shining and flowers, bursting with color, are pushing up through the warming ground. Life is insanely busy, but for just two minutes go ahead and jump off the merry-go-round and take a deep breath. Appreciate nature’s miraculous offerings of the season. Now, do you think you can do this for a couple of minutes every day? I’d like you to try it!

It’s so easy to get caught up in our busy, aggravating, stressful and sometimes even mundane lives that we don’t always take the time to appreciate the beauty in our children; nor do we take the time to teach them to appreciate the positive in their own lives.

To begin your daily two minutes of reflection, ask yourself this question:

“As a parent, what am I most grateful about today?” Is it the sweet kiss that you got as you left for work? That, just this once, your teenager didn’t argue with you? That siblings helped each other with homework?

Some days the answer will come easily to you, in fact you may have a long list that makes you feel grateful. However, on more stressful parenting days, feeling appreciative of your child may be somewhat more challenging. These are the days it is most important to stop for a moment to ask yourself the question AND then really search until you find a meaningful answer. Doing so will help you keep a clear perspective on what is most important in your life as a parent. No matter how upset, angry or frustrated you may be right now, you can find the beauty in your relationship with your child when you stop and look for it. You simply have to take the time to stop and do so.

This is also an important skill to teach your child. Begin by helping him ask himself the following question each night before going to sleep:

“What was the best thing about today?” Was it that we had outdoor recess? Am I happy because I made a new friend? Did I have my favorite lunch? Did the teacher give me a compliment? Did I get my homework done really quickly?

Of course, as with parents, kids will have an easier time on some days than on others finding the ‘best’ in their day. If it was a difficult day, it will be harder for your child to find the good in it. This is when it is most important for you to help your child find something positive about the day—don’t accept ‘nothing’ for an answer!

You probably realize that being a good parent is hard work largely due to regular challenges from the very child you are trying to raise! So take a little time each day to appreciate the true beauty in your child (and also teach your child this skill). This will help melt away the frustrations you may feel as you go through the tough parts!


Dr. Susan Bartell is America’s #1 Family Psychologist. Her latest book is The Top 50 Questions That Kids Ask. You can learn more about her at www.drsusanbartell.com.

GUEST BLOG POST: Jumpstart a Healthy School Year - by Dr. Susan S. Bartell

As we transition from carefree days of summer to structured, busy weeks of the school year, it’s a great time to start a new healthy lifestyle, along with the new notebooks! As kids return to school, as parents and caring adults, we must take an active role in helping them make healthy lifestyle choices, so they don’t slip into a “too much junk food” or “no time for exercise” rut. To do this, here are four conversations you get to have with your child:

1. “This fall, we’re making a pact as a family to make healthy changes. We’re going to eat fewer fast-food meals and more healthy home-cooked meals.”

2. “Here’s another great change – we’ll eat healthy snacks every day: fruits, vegetables, and low-fat cheese, yogurt and peanut butter, whole grain treats – at home and in your lunch box. Even if other kids bring less healthy snacks to school, we know that the best way to fuel your brain for learning is with healthy food!”

3. “It’s hard to stay active during the school year because you’re so busy. But, it’s important to move your body, so, I’m going to help you by making sure you get to play indoors or outside for at least half an hour every day – even when it’s cold!”

4. “You might not love this last one, but to help you stay active, we’ll limit screen time (TV, computer, handhelds) to no more than two hours each day. It might be hard at first, but your body will be happy, so I’m going to stay on top of it!”

For tips and ideas to help you and your children eat healthy and stay active – at home and school – visit Action for Healthy Kids.

A supporter of Action for Healthy Kids, Susan Bartell is a nationally recognized psychologist and award-winning author who seeks to help people recognize that they can have greater control over their emotional health and physical well-being, and can improve the quality of their lives. She facilitates healthy lifestyle seminars on topics that include teaching parents how to raise children with healthy relationships with food and eating, and how to care for themselves through physical activity and exercise. She is the author of Dr. Susan's Fit and Fun Family Action Plan: 301 Things You Can Do Today and writes a monthly feature for Action for Healthy Kids’ Family Corner.

GUEST BLOG POST: A Teachable Moment - Summer Exploration by Dr. Susan Bartell

The summer is great when you’re a kid. The stressful weeks of school have been left far behind and autumn’s cold and dreary days seem like they’re still forever away. Each sunny moment is an opportunity for something new—an interesting shell on the beach; a new friend at the park; a delicious ice-cream flavor. The summer is a time for exploring.

In addition to being fun, exploring is an important task of childhood. By becoming a detective, a child learns that one must look beyond the obvious “big picture” to see the world as interesting and complex. Developing the ability to explore with an open and inquisitive mind—to analyze situations, objects and places—is a skill that will carry a child far beyond the fun of the playground and into a successful adult life.

It is important for you to provide opportunities for your child to explore—and summer is the perfect time. Encourage digging holes on the beach by making sure you remember to bring the shovel. Invite exploration in the playground by leaving ample time to play. Ensure bicycles and their safety equipment are accessible and ready to go. Your enthusiasm and patience (rather than frustration or boredom) will support your child’s desire to question and learn. At home, adventures can be found in baking or homegrown scientific experiments with soap, water, clay and…just ask your young explorer! Summer days are perfect for ‘science’ when patios or driveways can be hosed down afterwards!

Exploring need not be reserved for playful detective work! Trying new foods is a type of exploration—a venturing into unknown and for many children, scary territory. However, the summer is a great time for widening a child’s palate. For one thing, it is less stressful, having left behind the “hurry up and eat, we’ll be late for school, homework or bed.” There are also so many great foods to try—fruits, BBQs and picnic foods all seem tastier and more fun in the summer. So, invite your child to explore a rainbow of summer foods—make it tempting by cutting them into interesting designs or serving them in fun ways. Invite neighbors to a picnic in the backyard—new foods taste better on colorful paper plates while sitting under a tree, especially when other kids are eating them too—peer pressure can work wonders when it comes to exploring foods.

Some children are born explorers. For others, the idea of venturing out of their comfort zone doesn’t seem like fun, it feels overwhelming. Sometimes a child is left behind by the others who want to explore—especially when the park, pool and beach are calling out for adventure. A reluctant explorer may need a boost from you to get over fear. Also, ask yourself if you’re contributing to his or her anxiety by conveying your own worries about straying too far, getting hurt or becoming dirty. If so, you’ll want to keep this in check so your child can become a more confident explorer—while still being safe of course!

Igniting interest in creative exploration is a gift you can give your child that will burn brightly long into adulthood. So get out your favorite walking shoes, your digging stick and your magnifying glass and get ready to explore!

Dr. Susan Bartell is America’s #1 family psychologist. Her latest book is The Top 50 Questions Kids Ask. You can learn more about Dr. Bartell at http://www.drsusanbartell.com/.