Twas the Night Before Christmas - by Cara Potapshyn Meyers

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,

Not a creature was stirring, 

Except for myself.

My child was sleeping, all snug in his bed.

While visions of Nintendo games, flew through his head.

Only I heard the sound of reindeer hooves clatter,
Which made me sigh, "Now what's the matter?"

With ribbon and gift wrap still clutched in my hand,
I descended the stairs, and saw the old man.

He was covered with ashes and plenty of soot, 

Which fell with a shrug, all underfoot.
"Oh great," I muttered, "Now I have to clean the rug too."

"Ho-ho-ho!" cried Santa, "I'm glad you're awake."
"Your gift was especially difficult to make."

"Thanks, Santa, but all I want is some time alone."
"Exactly!" he chuckled, "I've made you a clone."

"A clone?" I asked, "What good is that?
Run along, Santa, I've no time for chit-chat."

She was my twin. Same hair, same eyes.
Same look of chagrin, same gaze of surprise.

"She'll cook, she'll dust, she'll mop every mess.
You relax, take it easy, read a book, go to bed."

"Fantastic!" I cheered. 

"My dream come true!
"I'll internet shop. I'll read. I'll sleep the whole night through! "

From the room above, my son began to fret.
"Mommy?! I’m scared...is Santa here yet?"
The clone replied, "I'm coming, sweetheart."
"Hey," I smiled, "She knows her part."

The clone went to comfort my son with a tune.
"You’re the best Mommy ever. " I heard my son swoon.

“I really love you." The clone smiled and sighed, 

"I love you, too," my sweet son replied.

I frowned and I said, "Sorry, Santa, no deal. "
“That's my child's love, she's trying to steal."

Smiling wisely Santa said, "To me it is clear, "
Only one loving mother, is needed here."

I kissed my child, and tucked him into bed.
"Thank you, Santa, for clearing my head.
I sometimes forget, it won't be very long,
When he'll be too old, for my cradle-song."

The clock on the mantle began to chime.
Santa said to the clone, "It works every time."
With the clone by his side, Santa merrily said, "Merry Christmas to all!”

To me he whispered, “And to you, a good night!”

We wish all our readers a very Happy New Year!!

Interfaith Holiday Mayhem - by Cara Potapshyn Meyers

It is November 30th. The stores have had holiday decorations up since the beginning of November. Greeting cards for the holidays have been out for roughly the same amount of time. Even holiday music has been playing on the radio for the past couple weeks. Worst of all, my son has been making up his gift lists for both Hanukkah and Christmas.

We are raising our son in the Jewish faith, so we celebrate Hanukkah. Since I am not Jewish, we also put up a “Christmas” tree purely to celebrate my holiday traditions. There has never been any religious affiliations with our tree discussed in our home. I never even mentioned Santa. When my son was young though, he picked up on the notion of Santa and the bringing of gifts very early on. 

We obliged his fantasy when he was younger. I thought that because we live in a predominantly Jewish community, his fantasy of Santa would fade at an early age. No such luck. My son is still steadfast in his belief of Santa. His belief is adamant to the point that some children in his school vehemently told him that he was not Jewish because not only did he still believe in Santa, but that I was not Jewish, therefore he was definitely not Jewish (by definition, some Jewish communities believe that the child MUST be born to a Jewish mother to be considered completely Jewish. We belong to a Reform Temple that states that if one parent is Jewish, then the child is considered Jewish.) 

My son came to me saddened and confused the other day. We had a VERY long discussion about this tender issue. I first had to explain to him that regardless what others thought about him being Jewish, our Temple recognizes him as Jewish, therefore he WAS Jewish. You could see his whole body relax from that explanation. I subtlety also addressed the fact that he was a better person than the children who were judging him and making him feel bad about himself. My son is quite aware that we do not judge anyone else based on what they look like, believe in, or practice. My sister-in-law is from India, so we have discussed tolerance of other cultures and beliefs from a very early age.

I explained further that although I was not born Jewish, I still embrace Judaism through taking courses at our Temple and trying to learn Hebrew. I even have my son participate in Shabbat services at sundown on Friday nights and will be taking him to Shabbat services throughout the year (Shabbat is a Jewish practice through prayer and a meal, performed at sundown, and carried through as a “day of rest” all day Saturday until one hour past sundown, Saturday night).

As for our “tree,” I explained that I grew up with holiday traditions that are not embraced by Judaism, however it brings back warm, special memories for me seeing a sparkling tree decorated with a slew of my mother’s handmade ornaments. My heart swells every year when I decorate that tree since my mother died when I was only 19 years old.

About Santa...I felt as if I had to almost dig out the Polar Express DVD we have. I had been hoping that my son would have given up the notion of Santa way before now. My son, however, insists that Santa still exists. Knowing his personality, he probably wants to “prove” to his naysayer peers that they are wrong. Whatever the case, my son still “believes.” He still has his list for Santa as well as his list for Hanukkah (lucky kid, I often tell him!), with his lists getting longer and consequently more expensive. I think that when Santa does not deliver the $400 Lego set my son is craving, the reality of Santa may finally be over. We will see. Since I don’t know what small items my son wants for Hanukkah, and he knows we buy him those gifts, he has been pointing out some Nintendo games that he would like and some inexpensive action figures he is desiring. 

Interfaith holidays...so complex and confusing to children. Yet giving up my “holiday tree” would take away so much pleasure for me. I embrace our multiple Menorahs we light up every year. I also have Hanukkah decorations that fill our home. I even have been collecting dreidels (spinning tops used in a traditional Jewish game played during Hanukkah) for my son, every year since he has been born. I write a heartfelt message on the boxes and date them so that he will have a collection of them, from me, once he is older. They are made out of all types of material: clay, metal, glass, wood. His first one is made from bone china. Yet the complexity remains.

I wonder if my son will be asking me next year, “Mommy? Is there really a Santa Claus?”

The Calm After the Storm - By Cara Potapshyn Meyers

My son wanted a White Christmas...badly. So badly, that he had me e-mail “Santa” the night before and ask for “lots and lots of snow.” Well, we did get “lots and lots of snow,” in the form of a Blizzard! But just a day late for my son. I fibbed and told him that if it snowed as badly as it had on Christmas day, I wouldn’t have been able to have us go to my best friend’s house to celebrate Christmas. Which also meant that he wouldn’t have been able to play with my best friend’s son nor her sister’s two children that day. So my son forgave Santa.

When my son woke up early Sunday morning he was practically counting the snowflakes as they fluttered out of the clouds! He kept running to the windows to see if there was enough accumulation to make a snowman...or at least a snowball!

Then around midday, the storm really started to pick up. My husband relented and said he would take our son to a park near to where his Mother lives, because there are small hills to ride down on a sled. My son was ecstatic!! We packed up his snow gear and sled! Then Daddy took him off to have some fun in his 4-wheel drive vehicle!

As predicted, but uncertain to us, the blizzard came on so quickly and fast, my husband was not able to get home even in his 4-wheel drive. They detoured to his Mom’s instead.

                                                                       

At first I was disappointed because I had promised my son that I would make the ”biggest snowman ever” with him on Monday, once the storm subsided. Unfortunately, everyone was snowed in very badly. And the roads were completely impassable. I opened my back door to let my dog out that morning and 4 inches of snow fell onto the floor...from behind the storm door!! I pushed the storm door with all my might about 18 inches - just enough for my dog and I to squeeze through.

We were completely and literally snowed in. We have a plow service, but they hadn’t arrived yet. There were 5-foot snowdrifts against my garage. If I opened my front door, 2 feet of snow would have fallen into my house. This was definitely a “go no where, stay at home," kind of day. And I began to like it!! 

I kept looking out of the windows to see the beauty of the snow on tree limbs and foliage, weighing each bow down. The pure, white powder, blanketing our backyard. Untouched in any way. Even our snowman windsock looked like a holiday card! Which it just might become for next year! Nature was finally still, pristine, magnificent in it’s own incredible way.

I thought back to my child who started this life in very much the same way: Pristine and beautiful, as all babies are when they are born. You watch them grow. You see how your manners, values and lifestyle influence their growth. Both the good and the bad! Then our children go through a period when they mirror us. I can remember my son watching me put on make-up when he was 2 years old and trying some out himself, as my husband freaked out over seeing this! I knew this was just a phase. Now I have to beg and plead for my son to put a tiny bit of Chap Stick on his lips so that they don’t crack!

My son is at an age where he is highly influenced by the norms of society, especially through his peers. His way of speaking, his gestures, his humor all demonstrate this. What he likes to do or dislikes is becoming apparent and obviously somewhat influenced by his small world. Like a butterfly in its chrysalis, he is metamorphosing right before my eyes!

They say that the most influential and formative years, where a parent has the most affect on a child’s “core” nature is between the ages of birth and 7 years. In many ways I can see how my interactions with him have had positive affects. Now it’s society’s turn. How will he fair against the odds when his parents aren’t around? How much influence will his peers have on him - both good and not so good? Only time will tell.

In a few days we will have a new year. Good or bad, I’m always curious as to where it will take me. And my somewhat optimistic nature always tends to see it as a fresh start. A new beginning. A time to change. Always starting out fresh, pristine, and untouched. Just like the beauty outside my windows.

I wish all of our readers a very happy, healthy, amazing New Year! Let’s see where it takes us all!

Happy Christmakkah! by Jamie

As a Jew, I’ve always embraced the traditions of Judaism, but not necessarily its religious aspects. For instance, I don’t go to temple, was never Bat Mizvahed, and must admit that most of my Yom Kippur fasts have been solely weight loss-driven. However, I do know (and often use) a few dozen Yiddish words, wish just as many friends a “sweet” New Year around Rosh Hashanah as I do on January 1st, and truly “kvelled” over giving my daughter a Hebrew name at a baby-naming ceremony. I may not “practice” my religion all the time, but I certainly appreciate it—the holidays, stories, and most of all, the familial bonds (and, well, the food, too!). And as the mom of a toddler, I really look forward to starting—and continuing—traditions with my daughter for all of the Jewish holidays.

That said, hooray for Hanukkah! This is the first year that Jayda, at 2-1/2, can really join in—and begin to understand—our holiday celebrations. I have a special Crayola crayon-shaped menorah to light with her, eight presents to give to her on each of the eight nights, and a family Hanukkah dinner planned, with home-made latkes headlining the meal. I’m looking forward to it all. But I’m not looking forward to competing with Christmas.

I’m no Scrooge, and I certainly understand the appeal of Christmas; I’d be a hypocrite if I didn’t admit to that. My mother’s mother was Irish-Protestant, until she gave up her religion for my Jewish grandfather. However, she never stopped celebrating Christmas, and my own mother carried that tradition into our home. When I was growing up, we celebrated Hanukkah, but we also had a Christmas tree, left cookies for Santa on a table near the chimney, and woke up on Christmas morning to a pile of gifts. It made sense because it was a part of my mother’s upbringing, but for me, as a single Jewish mother, it doesn’t make sense anymore. There’s no reason for me to have a Christmas tree in my home, or even teach my child to believe in Santa Claus. But I fear it’s going to take a heck of a lot of work to get Jayda to understand that Hanukkah is “just as much fun” as Christmas.

A few weeks ago, Jayda pointed to a picture of Santa Claus and asked me, “Who’s that?” Moments later, she gestured to a picture of a Christmas tree and said, “What a pretty tree!” I explained to her as best I could who Santa Claus is, and why that tree was covered with decorations, and she soon lost interest. But I know that was just the beginning.

Let’s face it: We live in a Christmas-focused world. Every street in our neighborhood is filled with Christmas lights, huge fusses are made over Christmas tree lighting ceremonies, and our stores are swarming with Christmas-themed decorations, gifts, toys, and candy. True, there are Hanukkah books that I can read to Jayda, and occasionally I’m able to find a TV special airing which focuses on our holiday. This past week, I was especially thrilled to discover that at Jayda’s daycare, they had a Hanukkah unit: All week long, Jayda’s class read stories about the holiday, made crafts, and even enjoyed Hanukkah treats. But it still doesn’t compare to the Christmas craziness that will be saturating the same daycare—and everywhere else—in upcoming weeks.

Because my childhood included Christmas celebrations and I “had the best of both worlds,” I never really noticed the lack of Hanukkah hoopla around us, but I’m pretty certain my own child will. Perhaps I’m worrying needlessly, but I hate to think Jayda will feel like she’s missing out on something just because we’re Jewish. I know the best I can do is embrace our Jewish traditions, as I do, and pass my enthusiasm for them along to Jayda. Hopefully then she’ll appreciate who we are—and what our holiday means. This Hanukkah, I know Jayda will be doing plenty of celebrating, enjoying her family, and receiving lots of great gifts, and that’s a tradition no one should find reason to complain about.