A New Day is Dawning... by Liimu

Be careful what you wish for...you just might get it.

I have been an avid believer in the Law of Attraction since I read The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne (along with half of the world) back in 2008. I'm not sure what it did for anyone else, but it definitely changed my life on many levels.

First of all, I found myself on stage singing a solo backed up by a choir hand-picked by Patti Labelle (with Patti herself directing) live on NBC for 10 million viewers. (If you don't believe me, click here.) I couldn't really believe it myself at the time, which I guess you figured out if you watched the whole clip. It was a surreal moment, and the lyrics to the song - "I'm letting go...give me one more chance...cause I can't do this on my own..." were not lost on me.

Soon after the Patti Labelle experience, I ventured into starting my own business. I quit my six-figure day job to start my own consulting company, relying on my networking skills alone to get clients and keep them. I doubled my income the first year. I have had slumps here and there, but I have always made more than I made when I worked a traditional job and I never looked back. Similar to when I was in the process of auditioning for Clash of the Choirs, I refused to entertain even an inkling of doubt about whether or not I would be successful.

Flash forward to now. After having my baby, I have been wracked with doubts about whether or not I could lose the baby weight and if so, how fast. I have been obsessively counting calories, enduring punishing workouts (including the half-marathon I ran the Sunday before Thanksgiving, despite knee pain beginning at mile 2), talking about it so much I bore myself and my kids keep trying to reassure me by telling me I'm skinny, and even getting snarky at the weight loss success my friends have been having while I have circled around the same five pound marks for months.

That's not me. That's not what I know to be the Law of Attraction and how it works. Well, actually, I guess it is. The same way for years my beliefs about my inability to be a singer if I wasn't 19 years old and a size 0 kept me singing in my car and the occasional wedding band until I employed the Law of Attraction to realize my dreams of singing on a large scale. The same way I spent a good chunk of my day complaining about my job, thereby securing my spot, only to find that once I put that same energy into what I really wanted to do - work for myself - that it would be successful beyond even my own imaginings.

And so why would I think that doing things that keep me far from my sense of joy - things like talking about how "hard" it is to lose weight, depriving myself of all the foods I love, pushing through brutal workouts even when I'm exhausted or hormonal - would get me closer to the body of my dreams and achieving my weight loss goals? Newsflash - it won't. In my experience, the Law of Attraction is LAW. So, if I believe that it's going to be hard - guess what? It's going to be hard.

I know some people will think this is mumbo jumbo, hocus pocus, crunchy granola BS (like my trainer, for one). I don't really much care. I know what's real and true in my life and I know for a FACT the Law of Attraction is a law of the Universe and I am filled with joyous intent to employ it in my favor from here on out. And guess what? I'm really enjoying myself, while I'm at it.

Today was full of laughing and singing and snuggling my kids. I haven't been to the gym since Monday. Won't get there tomorrow, either, because I have the chance to spend time with a friend from Australia who is only here until Friday. We will go for a walk, though, so at least I'll get the body moving. I am loving taking deep breaths before I eat anything so I can get in better touch with what my body wants. I've been reading books about intuitive eating and resonate so strongly with Geneen Roth, author of Women, Food and God, who said, "But once the belief and the subsequent decisions are questioned, diets and being uncomfortable in your body lose their seductive allure. Only kindness makes sense. Anything else is excruciating. You are not a mistake. You are not a problem to be solved." (To read more, click here.)

That was an aha moment for me. So, when my trainer asked me today how I was doing, I told him the truth. I said I was eating healthy, not exercising as intensely as he'd probably like me to but that I am no longer in a go-hard-or-go-home headspace, more of a be-gentle-be-healthy headspace. His response? "That's crap. You haven't been pushed hard enough by me. You're about to go off the cliff. Let's talk." I understand his concern. There have been many times I've used the idea of intuitive eating as an excuse to gorge myself only to come crawling back to him, tail between my legs. That's not what's happening now, and I told him so. I still believe he is one of the best trainers on the planet. He could get me there, if anyone could. I'm just not really in the mood to go. Does that mean I don't want a smaller body? Does that mean I'm opting to be this size the rest of my life? No, no more than it would mean that I didn't love the beach just because I decided to plan a mountain vacation instead. I'm opting to accept and love myself. Or, as one friend of mine put it - we can't beat ourselves into submission when what we really need to do is love and accept ourselves into surrender.

I surrender.

ROBIN'S SHOW RECOMMENDATION: NEWSical: Full Speed Ahead

No one in the news is safe!

The Drama Desk nominated revue NEWSical is back lampooning current events, headlines, newsmakers, celebrities, and politicians. With songs and material updated on a regular basis, composer-lyricist (Drama Desk Nominated) Rick Crom's topical musical comedy is an ever-evolving mockery of all the news that is fit to spoof. This new edition: Full Spin Ahead! Directed by Mark Waldrop features all new material, and an energetic, versatile cast of four including Christine Pedi, Christina Bianco, Michael West and John Walton West.

These topics and more are given Crom's signature treatment in a highly entertaining 90-minute (no intermission) revue of some of the most talked about topics of the year, including Don't Ask Don't Tell, Oprah's Final Season, Lady Gaga, Bristol Palin, etc.

This show is a delight!  If you need some levity in your life, and who doesn't?!....see NEWSICAL!  Full of wit, the talented cast does an impressive job particularly with celebrity impersonations of PeeWee Herman, Christina Aguilera (botching the Star Spangled Banner), Liza Minelli and Celine Dion.  The political scenarios weren't as much to my personal  liking, but skits, respectively, mocking Arnold Schwarzenegger and Oprah, were clever and riotous. I haven't laughed that much in a long time!

Pedi (Forbidden Broadway, Talk Radio) leads an ensemble that includes Christina Bianco (Drama Desk nominee, Forbidden Broadway), Michael West (Forbidden Broadway, When Pigs Fly) and John Walton West (Drowsy Chaperone national tour, The Producers National Tour).

Crom received two Drama Desk nominations for his work on NEWSical. He appeared on Broadway in Urinetown, Footloose and The Goodbye Girl. Rounding out the creative team are Ed Goldschneider (music director), Jason Courson (set designer), Josh Starr (lighting designer), David Kaley (costume designer) and Scott Delacruz (stage manager). NEWSical the Musical: Full Spin Ahead is produced by Tom D'Angora (Broadway Diva Christmas, Naked Boys Singing!, Divas I've Done) and Elyse Pasquale (Betty Rules).

The show is playing at The Kirk on Theatre Row, 410 West 42nd Street. Tickets may be purchased through Telecharge.com or by calling (212) 279-4200 or (800) 432-7250. For performance schedule and more information, visit http://www.telecharge.com/.  You may also visit http://www.newsicalthemusical.com/.

Dancing for Joy -- by Robin

I'm taking an acting class through the local adult ed, and it's really a challenge in more ways than one.

A novelist/playwright friend of mine in town suggested it because she knows I aspire to write a play ("Mensch: The Musical" based on my book HOW TO MARRY A MENSCH...which means decent person). She thought it could help with dialogue, etc.

I have to admit I had no idea what I was getting in to. In high school I was involved with theatre. I served as Prop Master for the production of Arsenic and Old Lace. And, when they did Anything Goes...despite not being a singer.....I auditioned and got selected as an Angel. It was fun, and I got to wear some glamorous/borderline sexy attire....a far cry from my stretch pants and t-shirts of mommyhood. I loved it. And, have always enjoyed hanging with theatre people. Theatre is one of my true loves. To this day, I can't get enough of it. And, I've taken playwriting classes which I've enjoyed, and would love to study further.

All that said, when I signed up for the adult ed acting class, I didn't know what to expect. And, what I've found is more than what I saw coming, and it's frankly....invigorating!

The instructor, who is very experienced and talented, puts a lot of effort into coming up with exercises each week, and homework assignments. This week, she brought in a CD player and announced that she was going to play the music of her rocker godson, and we were to move. Then, move more! she proclaimed. Then, respond to someone else's movement, she said. So, basically we were dancing in what, by day, is a kid's classroom. And, it felt freeing. I was not worried about being self-conscious (okay...maybe a tad). But, I didn't have much time to think about it. And, it was cool. I lost myself. It took me back to my single days when I used to go dancing (in my 20s,) wearing heels and all. Now I found myself momentarily wondering if I even remembered how to dance. How did I dance back then? Were my movements the same or close to it?

I don't go dancing anymore. It's not that I wouldn't want to (though I'm not big on wearing heels anymore). It just doesn't arise...except if we go to a wedding.

Isn't it interesting how at different phases of our life certain activities come and go?! I can understand if, as you age, physical challenges and limitations set in. But, if that's not the case, then why do we cease pursuing particular activities that we once enjoyed? Did we forget we liked them? Have we lost track of what brings us pleasure? Are we so caught up in being "busy" (whatever that means) to even think about inviting joy into our lives?

I was watching actress Kate Hudson, daughter of Goldie Hawn, interviewed on Oprah this week, talking about the upcoming movie Nine. In it, she has a big song/dance number, and while she was super nervous and doesn't consider herself a singer, she was well-trained and pulled it off with aplomb. Oprah asked her, "Are you always so joyous? Whenever you come on the show, you seem that way. " Hudson explained how she was raised to feel things deeply and then seek out the joy. What a great life lesson she got and can pass on to her young son.

How hard is it to blast the music in your own home or ipod and let loose in the privacy of your home if you like? Dance for joy. Let it rip! And, who knows what else might come up for you?

As a child, I loved to make pot holders, crepe paper flowers and other artistic items. I even remember being an entrepreneur back then and setting up a flower/pot holder stand in front of my house, in an attempt to sell my wares. I was quite crafty, and to this day, would probably enjoy crafts, but I don't allow myself the time to pursue it.

I'm so focused on productivity and life responsibility, that doing something just for fun doesn't
regularly cross my mind. I do think of things that my son would find fun. And, we have fun together. But, his idea of fun isn't always mine. And, while that's ok....I envy his ability to relish playtime and focus on that and nothing else when he'e engaged. I, on the other hand, often have racing thoughts going through my mind of all I have to or have decided I need to do/accomplish. But, what would happen if I didn't? What if I put something aside? How would that feel? I'd like to find out.

I wonder what my acting teacher will have in store next class?!

New Year....New You?

How was your new year's eve?

We chilled at home.

I'm been fighting this marathon cold and today, after being convinced by two friends, finally got myself to the ENT doctor. Turns out I need to be on antibiotic for five days. I'm so grateful I bit the bullet and went.

How often as moms do we treat ourselves as invincible? I somehow thought, as lingering as this cold has been, that it would ultimately go away. But, one of my friends reminded me that in a perfect world, that would be true, but sometimes we need a little help.

These words hit home for me.

We all need help at times, and there's nothing wrong with asking for it or even paying for it. Do you allow yourself to ask for it? Whether it's from a mate, friend, family member, stranger...etc.

There's a lot of talk about practicing self care and how important it is. And, I totally agree. But, sometimes self care isn't just about doing for ourselves. Part of that is giving ourselves permission to reach out. Seek out connections that have meaning to us. To hire poeple (if we can afford to) to help simplify our lives.

For example, we can't effectively give ourselves a massage. (I like to treat myself periodically, since I have a bad back.)

Sometimes it's a worthwhile investment to hire a cleaning woman, if your budget allows, and you choose not to spend your time cleaning your home.

I have a friend who cuts her own hair...but I don't go that route. I don't have the ability.

Spending quiet time alone can be wonderful and beneficial, but quality time with a friend (s) means a lot too.

Are you someone who suffers in silence or do you pick up the phone and call someone you can share with?

I am the supreme multi-tasker and that lends itself to burnout.

This year, I'd like to really prioritize how I spend my time and money and decide what is most important to me. What will bring happiness and fulfillment and ideally some monetary reward.

I want to appreciate myself. Honor myself. Try to get my needs met. Seek out happiness and fun more.

I'm good at playing roles, but I want to learn to step back and grant myself more balance.

I'm watching Oprah who is talking about this, and I find her very candid and inspiring. She said the "key is putting yourself back on your own to-do list." I LOVE that.

How about you? Are you on your to-do list?

Confessions of a "Later" Dad

I caught the season premiere of the Oprah Show on tv this week, and David Letterman was her guest. Broadcast specially from New York, much was made of Letterman's long-awaited appearance since he had joked for some time on his late night show about wanting to be on Oprah.

So, here they were. Two larger than life media powerhouses shooting the breeze. Letterman, who leads a very private life, for the first time that I have seen, opened up like a regular person versus someone who is "on." What I found most interesting was when the conversation pertained to his family life. Letterman, 60, along with his longtime 40 something girlfriend, is a parent to four year old Harry. He showed photos, and glowed as he spoked of him. Clearly, this is a "later" dad who never expected to become a dad, and he is super grateful for it.

What struck me was his candor. And, since you don't often hear from an "older" dad, it was refreshing. He said that one of the things he finds most challenging is the concept of "patience vs. discipline." And, I immediately thought, I know what he means.

When your child acts up, do you find yourself feeling compelled to discipline them because you don't have the patience to tolerate their behavior? This is natural....but how do you know when you might be overreacting because you're not as patient as a "younger" parent might be? Having your lifestyle changed so much by a child can't be easy for a man of 60.

Do you question your patience level? When it wears thin, does your child get a Time Out? And, do you second guess your actions?