It's About Numbers by Robin Gorman Newman

Tax season is upon us, and I’m not a happy camper.

My husband, a CPA, burns the midnight oil, including Saturdays, this time of year, and it’s not easy for any of us.

I feel for him.  And, for us.  Seth and I miss him when he’s not home, and don’t like to see him stressed and over extended.

We have much on our personal plates now, with my father in rehab (for a stroke), and Marc and I both getting PT (me for my injured knee), and Marc for his hips (in an effort to postpone the need for hip replacement).

What is it about numbers that can be so challenging?

My husband is great at them, though it often consumes his life.

My son, who is in third grade, is hugely challenged by mathematics.  And, when I spoke to a potential math tutor the other day, she commented how kids are introduced to math at a younger age, and really it's in fourth grade that kids are expected to do it.

I don't recall when I learned math as a kid, but it pains me to see Seth have such a hard time with it.  And, it impacts our home life by causing added stress.

The teacher claims he does okay in the classroom, but when it comes to homework, he says it's too hard.  She commented that kids often act differently with their parents.  No doubt that is true, but still, he knows he needs to do the homework, and that if he wants computer play time and television time, it has to get done. 

The homework battle is one many parents experience.  My friend Debbie and I were discussing it one day.  Her son is older, and she said she's sick of getting sick about his lack of motivation when it comes to homework.  She's read him the riot act, including explaining how he needs to step up to the plate if he wants to do well in school and get into a good college.  He acts indifferent. 

I'd hate for this to become a pattern with Seth.

What's a parent to do?
Should we hire a math tutor?  My concern is that it might feel like more pressure to Seth.
Kids do deserve downtime.
Is the homework just too much?

Children can't excel at everything even though it's expected of them.

Math wasn't my forte in school.  In fact, there were some mathematical subjects I despised.

To this day, I don't love even having to balance the check book.  In that sense, comes in handy that I married an accountant.  Though I wish there was some alternative to tax season.

There's gotta be a better way for him...and for my numbers-challenged son!

Throwing Out Homework by Maureen Eich VanWalleghan

Last night I watched the Race To Nowhere, a powerful film. As a later mom, it was easy to see my future self in the mothers who were interviewed. The desire to give one’s child every advantage and to know that they are fully prepared to move out into the world is a driving force in myself and in many moms.

There was so much that resonated for me in the film, but one particular moment really struck me. I believe it was an educator who was teaching AP Biology who wondered when it became acceptable that “school” dictated private life, which is what excessive homework does.

As an educator, I have been anti-homework for years, mostly because it turned into work I had to address once it came back. Essentially, homework would dictate my “private life” because it would quickly became work that overwhelmed me and would be the thing that I constantly had to deal with at home: piles of homework waiting for me. Thank you, but no thank you. It was interesting to hear this same perspective from another educator, but considering the student viewpoint. The notion that students could and are getting one hour of homework per class per night is absurd. Depending on the students’ age and their school, students could have between 5 and 7 hours of homework per night. That is a crime and mind numbing to consider. No wonder kids and parents are stressed out!

As a later mother, I am very invested in enjoying my child. I waited along time before having kids, which was not completely by choice, but that’s how it turned out. I relish time with my child. I enjoy her company and all the fun she brings and even the intensity of parenting when things are difficult. What seems crazy when it comes to homework is that suddenly relaxation time becomes nonexistent. Between homework and extra curricular activities the joy of just being with my kid is no longer there. In the end, I did not have my daughter so that someone else could dictate how I spend my time with her.

Since my daughter is in kindergarten this issue of homework has been on my mind. My husband and I picked a school with a half-day kindergarten and no homework. The Waldorf charter school where my daughter attends has been wonderful. And the school’s philosophy of no homework till about 4th grade is great. But, what happens after that. Seeing the Race To Nowhere was eye opening. This issue of homework for our daughter in the future is real and scary. I want to enjoy my daughter as she grows. I want to her to play and to have time to be a kid even as she is turning into a young adult.

For me, the Race To Nowhere is a call to action. Our thinking about homework needs to change. Even though as a society we hate homework, there is this insidious notion that both students and parents believe: without homework a course isn’t challenging and students aren’t learning. In the film, the book The Case Against Homework is mentioned. A book I am going to read. Also on the “End The Race To Nowhere” website (http://www.endtherace.org/)—a resource for parents who want to do more on change “school culture” to better serve kids—there are a number of other books that discuss the issue of excessive homework.

Right now, I think we need a parent rebellion: NO MORE HOMEWORK! If every parent walked into principals’ offices across the country and explained that homework is no longer acceptable then there might be some change. But, the first step is believing that homework is a detriment. Parents really have to check in with themselves on this issue. Checking the statics to back up the idea that homework is not needed could help.

Walking into the principal’s office alone could be daunting, but getting a group of parents together to get this discussion on the agenda of school boards would have tremendous impact. Really stopping homework is good for everyone: parents, kids and teachers. I can hear the chanting now: NO MORE HOMEWORK!, NO MORE HOMEWORK!, NO MORE HOMEWORK! When mothers want change to happen, it happens. Let's unleash the mommy factor and get rid of homework...

Hiswork or Mywork? by Robin Gorman Newman

Ahhh.....Homework.  Or should I say Hiswork or Mywork??

Seth had half a day this week….parent/teacher meetings.

After the play date I arranged for him, and he opened yet another Hanukkah present, we sat down to do his special homework assignment that is due in a week.

It was about ancestry. He was to choose a country of his ancestry, and research it in order to answer certain questions.

Since Seth is adopted, we don’t know his biological ancestry. So, we offered him a variety of options. Russia came up….my grandparents. Israel and Germany for Marc’s grandparents. I also mentioned Australia…since our bird Smokey is a cockatiel, and that’s where they are from.
The choice was Seth’s. He opted for Australia. So interesting to me that he went that route but not altogether surprising since he loves animals and his pet bird and fish.

What was somewhat surprising and questionable to me was the requirements of this homework.

Seth is in second grade, and this was most certainly not something he could do on his own. It mandated research….whether on the computer or from library reference books. We didn’t have anything handy at home relative to Australia.

He and I sat down at my lap top, and Google became our best friend. He knows how to use Google, so together we looked up various aspects of Australia, and I dictated/spelled answers for him. He was asked to fill in everything ranging from the most popular food in Australia, to top sights, to neighboring countries.

I have to confess…..most of this was total news to me. I actually had thought the capital of Australia was either Sydney or Melbourne. I was wrong. And, I didn’t know that Australia is in fact its own continent. Live and learn.

Foodwise….aside from kangaroo and crocodile…which Seth loved the notion of….another top food called Vegemite, some sort of breakfast spread, came up as a favorite. Who knew?! Meat pies were ranked high as well.

Sights included things like the Sydney Opera House and Great Barrier Reef.

It was a learning experience in terms of the information we uncovered…but what I questioned ultimately was the gain for Seth in doing this assignment. Was it his homework or mine?

What is the lesson he was supposed to take away from it?

He already knew how to search with Google.  He is fairly computer astute.
Was it just intended to be yet another mommy & me project? If so, I’m able to engage my son in a variety of ways without being given school work.

This felt like burden.
Australia isn’t a country he was taught about in school. Would it have been more effective if he were to further research something that is at least remotely familiar to him?! Will he retain the information? How will it be shared in the classroom with other students? Does he even know where Australia is? No.

Back in the day when I was in grade school, I don’t remember researching at the age of 7.

Homework such as this becomes one more thing for a parent to do…as if we don’t already have enough. And, what if you’re a working parent, where do you find the time? It’s not viable to assign it to the child himself at age 7.

Will someone please explain to me the necessity of such special school assignments when it’s above a child’s head? I don’t get it. But, I do now know that Canberra is the capital of Australia.

Thanksgiving and Gratitude - By Cara Potapshyn Meyers

Thanksgiving. I love this time of year. I love the beautiful changing colors of the leaves. I love going outside at night and smelling the woody smell of a fireplace burning in someone’s home. I love the anticipation of a Thanksgiving feast! I love all of the typical Thanksgiving foods! I even love preparing the Thanksgiving turkey myself! All 22 pounds of it! But this year Thanksgiving is going to be very different for me.

I’ve always celebrated Thanksgiving at home. First, when I was young, and my mother was still alive. She would set the dining room table with all of her fine china. And while I watched her cook her fabulous feast, I learned her “tricks” as to how her meal always came out so delicious! Then, when I celebrated Thanksgiving with just my father, he always made the first-of-the-season fire going all day in the fireplace! And while the fire was glowing, we would prepare our own, smaller feast to enjoy! Later, when I got married, we had Thanksgiving every year at my in-law’s home. My father was always there with his signature praline sweet potato pie! And for the past 15 years, I have always made the Thanksgiving turkey! Even when we lived in our first apartment and I had a small, dinky oven, I managed to get that bird into it and it always came out delicious!

My plans are different this year. I was invited by my cousins to celebrate Thanksgiving in a restaurant. This will be a whole new experience for me, as I always welcomed the warm, fuzzy, homey feeling of celebrating Thanksgiving in a home. My son will be going to my in-laws. I requested having him for Christmas to take him to my best friend’s house, where children his age will be frolicking and merriment will abound!

It feels odd for me to celebrate my favorite of all holidays in a restaurant. Even one that is going to be rather upscale. And although I have celebrated other holidays and events with my cousins, we never celebrated Thanksgiving together and I never spent it “alone” (meaning going by myself without other immediate family with me). This feels odd. But at the same time it feels loving and warm that my cousins thought enough of me to invite me with them.

Things change, I know. And the alternative was that I would have been at home with the dogs, probably eating a cheese sandwich. But this whole change really does feel so unsettling for me. I’m sure to get caught up in plenty of conversation with my cousins. Once we start, it’s hard to get us to stop! And I’m sure the food in this particular restaurant will be 5 Star. So I am certain that I will enjoy my meal. But, still, all of this feels “funny”. I just can’t shake this feeling, no matter how many positive spins I put on the occasion.

Well, I will certainly let you know how I fared with my next blog. In the interim, I thought I would leave you with a saying that is framed and hangs besides my bed:

Gratitude

There is no greater act than giving thanks.

Remember to acknowledge

the goodness in your life.

Quiet your mind, listen to your heart

and fill your soul with gratitude.

To all of our readers, I wish you a safe, joyful, warm and fuzzy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving to all!!

Through the Generations - by Cara

My son has been learning about the value of coins in school. To help him with his homework, I took out a basket of coins we use to throw our spare change into, and started laying the coins out to show a visual description to assist with one of the homework problems.

All of a sudden, my son noticed something interesting. He found a Wheat back penny among this basket of coins! For those of you who are unfamiliar with Wheat back pennies, instead of a picture of the Lincoln Memorial on the back, the words, “One Cent,” are inscribed.

I found this remarkable for several reasons. First being that Wheat back pennies are so rare (they were minted only for 50 years, between 1909 - 1959), secondly because I started my own collection of Wheat back pennies when I was around my son’s age (I must have close to 50 of them by now). Thirdly, because now my son wants to start his own Wheat back collection.

The fourth interesting reason is that my son spotted a bag of pre-started coin rolls and wanted to use them to roll the coins. When my father was still alive, I would give him our basket of loose change and the paper coin rolls, and he would spend enormous amounts of time putting the change into the respective rolls. He would then take the rolls to the bank and cash them in for me. He always took such pride in what he did and felt a sense of accomplishment in rolling those coins for me!

Now that my father is gone, I find it fascinating that my son wants to assume that same exact activity. As tedious as it is, both my father and son get a sense of accomplishment from rolling coins. We told our son that if he lays out the correct number of coins to fill a roll, correctly identifies the value of the coin roll, and then fills it, my husband would take him to the bank to “earn” his keep. It is a motivating learning experience.

But I have noticed this about my son; he has my father’s quality of enjoying working on tedious projects. I used to give my father all sorts of projects I just found too tedious to take on, and he would gladly do them all! The one I miss the most is ironing! My father used to iron our clothes because between a toddler and 2 rambunctious dogs, I didn’t want to risk having the iron accidentally pulled off the ironing board and scorching someone. So I would happily give all of my ironing to my father to do! I’ve become so spoiled, that now it’s become, “dry clean only,” in this house. And I rarely buy 100% cotton!

But back to my son and his new obsession. I find it fascinating that my son has not only taken an interest in something that I also have an interest in. I find it equally amazing that he has also embraced the “joy” of rolling coins, just as my father had. I continually find it amazing how you see not only yourself in your child, but can also see close relatives, with all of their “quirks,” in your child. How remarkable. And what a gift. And now my son has 2 Wheat back pennies to start his own collection! Such an unexpected treat!

GUEST BLOG POST: Organizing Kids - by Ana Homayoun, author, That Crumpled Paper Was Due Last Week: Helping Disorganized and Distracted Boys Succeed...

Last week, after a book signing for my recently released book “That Crumpled Paper Was Due Last Week: Helping Disorganized and Distracted Boys Succeed in School and Life,” a mother approached me to lament about how even though she thought that she had tried everything her son was on the verge of failing the eighth grade

After speaking with this mother for a few minutes, it became clear that it wasn’t just her son’s struggle to be organized that was the problem. Every time I would say something positive and encouraging, she would become negative. When I made a suggestion, she batted it down as though it wouldn’t work, even though she had yet to try it. Though this mother clearly was well-intentioned (she was giving up part of her Thursday evening to hear me speak and buy my book!) her own attitude and approach clearly made it impossible for her and her son to move forward.

Between all the activities parents have to juggle – jobs, finances, home life, kid’s school, sports and activities – parents don’t always readily realize that the message they send through their actions – both verbal and non-verbal – have an enormous impact on their child’s ability to become encouraged to make long-term changes towards personal and academic success.

Through my work with families, it is abundantly clear that parental attitude and approach are some of the main factors of long-term student success – here are few quick tips:

Make a Fresh Start and Let Go of Past Mistakes – In my book, I give the example of the a boss who no matter what you seem to do, reminds you of past mistakes, short-comings or your general failing to measure up. Most adults would long to find another job FAST, and don’t realize that they inadvertently treat their kids the same way. In my work, I always talk about the win-win – that is, how getting better organized will make the student’s life easier so he or she can spend more time doing whatever it is they enjoy – and that this process is all about THEM. For most pre-teens and teenagers, that can be a powerfully motivating message.

Let Your Child Take Ownership of his Successes and Mistakes – Over my years of work, I see that the most successful parent/child dynamics are those where the parent allows the child to develop their own skills and react to their own challenges. Some weeks and months might be smoother than others, but the overall trend is that over time, these kids develop into reliable, competent and hardworking young people.

Remain Calm and Re-Group as Necessary – When I give talks to parents and educators, I often get nervous laughter when I exclaim how “No child sits up late at night strategizing how they can stress you out by forgetting their homework on the printer!” As with everything, learning is a process, and kids will struggle as they learn new techniques. Structuring a weekly re-group time in your home, where kids can go through their backpack, clean out any crumpled papers, update their planner and start the week off in a great way is probably one of the best long-term changes parents can make.

I encourage you to look at this upcoming week or weekend as a time to start fresh, re-group and help your child on his or her own path to success!

Ana Homayoun is the author of THAT CRUMPLED PAPER WAS DUE LAST WEEK: Helping Disorganized and Distracted Boys Succeed in School and Life. She is also the Founder and Director of Green Ivy Educational Consulting, an educational consulting firm that encourages junior high and high school students to create their own framework for academic and personal success. A graduate of Duke University, Homayoun also holds a Masters Degree in Counseling from the University of San Francisco. She lives in Northern California. Visit http://www.thatcrumpledpaper.com/.

First Grade Algebra - by Cara

I may be dating myself, but I distinctly remember learning Algebra in the ninth grade. I had a VERY good but VERY strict woman teacher who explained the concepts so well, I think I received 100% on every test! And I don’t give myself the credit, because math is not my strong suit! This particular teacher was excellent! And I will never forget how wonderful she made me feel inside through being so successful in her class because she translated the concepts into such simple language! I had wished she taught every subject in high school!

Fast-forward 32 years later. I am sitting down with my already burnt out son, trying to figure out what in the world the teacher wants us to do with the algebraic equations on this piece of paper! And, of course, all of the problems are verbal, so not only do you have to understand what is written (which my son has problems with to begin with), but also you then have to take this verbal information and translate it into numeric equations! In first grade!!

Not only did I have to send my whining son away to take a break so that I could focus on the math problems at hand, I went into my husband’s office to show him this sheet of nonsense to see if HE could figure it out! And unlike me, he did NOT do well in algebra!!

So my question is, what is going on here? I’ve asked my son’s teacher why a first grader needs to know algebra and her response was that the fourth and fifth grade teachers are getting flack from administration because the children in these grades are not doing as well on the standardized tests. If math concepts are filtered down earlier through the grades, by fourth and fifth grade, children should be showing improvements on the standardized tests.

What all of this boils down to is rank order. School systems are becoming so competitive that first graders are now being pushed to do algebra so that by fifth grade these children do so well, that the school is ranked higher against other schools.

This is all beauracracy!! My son is made to believe that he is “dumb” because he can’t spit out algebraic equations on the tip of his tongue! He has to come home from a long day at school and practically cry because some school administrator feels it is necessary to “filter down” math to the lower grades so that they will later do better on standardized tests?? I would like to take my son, who has above average intelligence, I am told, and sit down with him to do this so-called “algebra” at the administrator’s home! I would like for the administrator to see how it demeans a child’s sense of accomplishment when they struggle to understand a concept that is way beyond his comprehension! Especially when they have had 40 minutes of homework that they’ve already done! I’d like this administrator to watch as my son starts to cry because he can’t take anymore of this unnecessary insanity and just puts down anything on the page, just to be done with it!! Then this administrator can tell me about the benefits of “filtering down” mathematic concepts to the lower grades!!

What did I end up doing with this homework? I sent in a nicely written note, asking the teacher to send home more specific instructions, so that the parents could assist their children with their homework. No algebra homework has come home since.

By the way, unless you are a teacher or mathematics/English major, could you explain to me just exactly what an “addend” or “dipthong” is?

In Support of Support Groups -- by Cara

I tend to be a quiet and reserved type...not terribly outgoing and mildly social. But for some reason, I am attracted to support groups. Particularly support groups for Moms.

Since my son was an infant, I participated in a myriad number of different groups. Some groups were informative, but I didn’t “click” with most of the Moms. Other groups had members who I felt had different issues and/or a focus to the group that I just wasn’t looking for.

I was thrilled to find Motherhood Later...Than Sooner because not only did I find a lovely group of Moms I have kept in contact with, but my son has become friendly with some of the sons of other “Later” Moms as well!

This past weekend, I went away with a large group of Moms on what I term a “Mommy Retreat.” There were quite a large group of us...150 to be exact, and I found comfort being amongst so many diverse but dedicated Moms.

There were workshops where we each had a turn to divulge a dirty little secret about being neglectful about our mothering. I happened to have divulged SEVERAL dirty little secrets! And the bonding and camaraderie that was taking place in that room at that moment allowed each and every one of us to say, “We ARE good mothers! We’re just not perfect ALL of the time! It was so refreshing to say out loud, “I slack off occasionally and my child still survives!!” Some participants were even trying to “one up” the one who “confessed” before them! We all left, happy, giggling, with a huge weight lifted off our shoulders!

There was also a woman comic who had the entire audience falling over with laughter as she played out daily scenarios that occurred in her home, tongue-in-cheek style! What a great way to start out the retreat and break the ice regarding all the taboos that go on in each person’s household, but no one wants to dare bring the topics up! Well, this lively comic did, and we cheered her on endlessly!

I left this retreat saying goodbye to friends old and new. Learning more about myself and learning more about other miscellaneous topics such as social media! But I mostly reinforced that I love to come together with a group of Moms who understand the pressures of parenting and want to help each other through it as well as spend time remembering who WE are as people, as individuals, and not just someone’s wife or mother!

I came home to a Parenting Workshop to go to at my son’s school the very next day where we really got into a hot debate about parenting and homework issues. Some Moms literally couldn’t understand why homework wasn’t “fun” in every household. Other’s of us moaned in agony just thinking about doing homework with our child. I exclaimed that I had such a horrendous year with my son last year that just THINKING of homework this year gave me post traumatic stress disorder symptoms! This one Mom shot back, “Well, then you’re just doing something wrong.” It was a good thing that the social worker moderating the group knew of my struggles last year and effectively put this other Mom in her place. Still and all, I came out of this workshop empowered and ready to take on the task of parenting in a way only I know is effective with my child!

The NY chapter of Motherhood Later Than Sooner will soon try to gather interested parents into support groups with a highly educated facilitator. I was at a group this facilitator ran and found it filled with energy and bonding where we all wanted to jump into the conversation at once! It was invigorating! I left feeling better about myself than when I first arrived! Maybe you’d like to give a support group a try? And if one isn’t a good fit, move on to another. As for me, I am looking forward to participating in the NY chapter support group and see how it turns out! As they say, you can always learn something new every day!

Whose Homework is This Anyway? -- by Cara

I’m tired of my son’s elementary school. And he just started first grade. I’m still getting over being tired of it from last year, when my son was in Kindergarten. What am I so tired about? Homework. And not just the part of homework that my son has to complete, but the endless, detailed instructions that the PARENTS (read: Mothers) have to complete in order for their child to correctly complete their assignments.

Take, for instance the buldging workbook that came home yesterday along with three different assignments! Supposedly, from what I can gather after reading the instructions on one of the assignments a half dozen times, I am supposed to copy certain “sight words,” preferrably on colored paper, and hang them up all over my house, make “flash cards” of these “sight words,” and run around after my child, while he is home, holding up these cards or pointing to the words hung up in each room and “quiz” him on these particular words! I also have to glue a smaller set of these words in a “Word Wall Book” with the instructions,”Be CAREFUL! Don’t glue the pages together!” What? Am I now in first grade too?!

I don’t get it. I am more than happy to assist my son with writing words, helping him read simple books, and suggest illustrations to complement what he wrote. But all of this copying, taping, pasting...who realistically has time for this in today’s world? And I have just one child! What do parents do who have several children, all of who’s teachers are requesting what will probably amount to an hour’s worth of time copying, cutting, taping and pasting too?! And to top it all off, we were reprimanded! Although it was not stated anywhere in the detailed instructions that all of this had to be handed in the next day, we were sent home a note reminding us that we were supposed to return the pasted,“Word Wall Book” AND the three other lengthy assignments the next day! Tisk, tisk on us! We also didn’t get to hang up “sight words” or make flash cards either! Oh, for shame!!

Last year, at the beginning of school, the Kindergarten teacher asked us to buy a two pocket folder. The PARENTS were given 2 weeks to cover the entire folder, front and back with photos that our children would use in order to create “stories” which would be presented back to us at the end of the year. This little project took me, all totalled, two HOURS to complete! Since our home color copier was not working very well, I had to upload some 20 to 25 photos to an internet photo website where copies were printed and mailed back. I even had to upgrade the cost of shipping to Second Day Priority, so that I would have time to do the SECOND part of this exciting project! Once I received the photos, I then had to group similar photos together, then cut and paste them all over both sides of this “Creativity Folder!” I spent so much time on this thing I took photos of it! And guess what? My son did not use one photo grouping to write his “stories!” I personally spent two hours over two weeks preparing this rediculous folder only to find that my son didn’t want to write about the photos! He had his own creative agenda. Can you say, TOTAL waste of time, money and energy?!

So guess what I am NOT going to do this year? I am NOT going to make colored “site word” cards and place them all over my house. I am NOT going to be making any flash cards and chase my son around, asking him what each card says. And I am NOT playing “Memory Game” every single night to help foster “sight word” recognition, as my child’s teacher puts it, “in a snap!” No, I am not going to do any of that. Unless my son’s teacher would like to come to my home each evening and make my family’s dinner, do the dishes, get lunches ready, put in a load of laundry and also feed and walk my dogs. Well, then it is just not going to get done. Sorry, Ms. First Grade teacher. It is just NOT going to happen in this house!

School Approaching - by Robin

Where does the time go?

School will be here before you know it, and it's first grade for Seth.

Everyone says it's much more demanding than kindergarten. That remains to be seen. I'm crossing my fingers the homework isn't daunting.

It's been so nice having him come home from camp and just being able to chill. Some of the biggest challenges were creating a funky hairstyle for him for Wacky Wednesday and picking clothes in black 'n red for checkerboard day.

The whole after school homework thing is such a challenge for everyone.

And, now we're giving thought to after school activities.

There is no after class program for first graders at the school. So, two days we have enrolled him in a dropoff program similar to day care. But, what about the other days? Should we consider Hebrew School? (He has no interest in that.)

Two other mom friends have broached the subject of martial arts.

Another mentioned tennis.

How much and what to do? And, all this taking into consideration the demands of school itself.

We're not rushing into signing him up for anything as yet, but I do feel like I'd like to have a potential gameplan in mind.

I don't want to be one of those overscheduling moms. Kids need ample time to chill. But, it's tempting to sign them up for programs that seem cool, especially if their friends are doing it. I don't buy into the whole "keeping up with the Jones parenting thing," but it is easy to be influenced.

So, as I call up karate places, kids gyms, synagogues, etc. , we'll see what jumps out at us and Seth. If he had his way, he'd be happy staying home and watching Sponge Bob for hours after doing homework.